Working 9 to 5

It has been over a year since I returned to full time work after having Oliver. I took six months of for maternity and boy did it fly by. I enjoyed every moment and as hard as it was leaving Oliver, I knew I was ready to return to work and get some of the 'old me' back. 

I am the sort of person who can't do anything half-hearted and really do throw myself into whatever I put my mind too. And being a working mum is no exception. I'm really fortunate that I've worked with the same company for the past 12 years so they know I'm committed and have supported me in returning to work. A lot of my other 'mum friends' haven't been as fortunate. 

The hardest part for me returning to work was the added pressure of Oliver having a heart condition (more on this when I can muster up the courage to write about it!) and I am not embarrassed to say this has made me quite an over protective mum. 

I'm really fortunate that my husband and I share Oliver's childcare so we don't have to rely too much on family, nurseries or childminders and the transition of returning to work wasn't too different from our routines. I work the mornings and evenings so Oliver and I get afternoons together. This is great as I don't really feel like I'm missing out on too much. Luckily Oliver is pretty settled in his routine and he knows that mummy leaves first thing for work but will be back in a few hours. I put him to bed and start work again in the evening so he gets a morning with Daddy and an afternoon with Mummy. 

It's inevitable there will be times when I want to commit a little more to work and feel like I'm letting Oliver down or vice versa which is a constant juggling act. 

I've read a few 'mummy blogs' over the past few months, mainly to get some sanity. I started reading a blog by a lady called Ursula who runs Mumbelievable. She tells it like it is, she doesn't hold back at all and has had quite a journey as a mum to her little boy Xav. She shares those real experiences which is so reassuring. 
Ursula and her colleague Donna recently launched an online programme called Returning to Work with Confidence. 
Clearly I don't have enough on my plate already so I decided to join the programme and it is certainly time well spent. The programme is great for giving you that much needed boost. It's online, so once a week when Oliver goes to bed I put my feet up, have a cup of tea, or glass of wine, and watch the video. They're only short sessions, no longer than an hour, with really simple exercises which really just get you thinking. I'm only a few sessions in but the ladies have already helped me think about my perspective of myself as a mum and the internal pressure this brings. I've been thinking about choices and how I make decisions based on my work or my family. Something really important I've started to rediscover is how important time for 'me' really is. Even if it's just 10 minutes on my own or doing my nails, it's something I'm choosing to do for myself and it is so refreshing. Honestly I'm not on commission but if you're in a simialr position i would thoroughly recommend singing up for the programme, it's at such a minimal cost for the resources & support you receive. I'm keen to do the next session already! 

The past year for me has really been finding my way and now I feel ready to not only be a mum but also to get some of my old self back.