The Big Day...

I last posted in May about finding Oliver a nursery and today was the big day! 

After two settling sessions last week, which didn't go too badly, Simon took Oliver to start his 5 hour afternoon session. 

Luckily, for me, I was at work so didn't have to witness Oliver gripping to Simon for dear life! I'm almost certain I'd have wrapped him in my arms and carried him off home. However, he did let go and he lasted the full session which is more than we could have ever hoped. 

Mummy on the other had has spent the past week an emotional wreck - something I'm not apologetic for at all and have since learnt is completely normal and natural. 

Putting your child into any form of childcare is daunting, well it is for the majority of mum's I've spoken with. 

For me the biggest issue was handing my little boy over for 5+ hours a day and not really having a clue what he's doing. Is he eating ok? Do they understand when he's asking for a drink in his own unique way? Is he upset? Does he want mummy cuddles? Is he tired? How will he nap with strangers? All questions I've asked myself pretty much every minute of this afternoon. 

And yet somehow we have got through it. 

In the past 2 years, I've frequently wished I had more toddler free time to get stuff done or to mooch around the shops. That was until today when I found myself aimlessly wondering around the aisles of Tesco just wishing the time away. The house is spotless, I'd caught up with work, had a chat to family, then spoke to a dear friend and still the minutes dragged on. Thank goodness he's only going in one day a week for now, what would I do with myself if it was more frequent!!!! And then 5.30pm struck and I practically skipped to the nursery to collect him.  

The images in my mind of Oliver seeing me then running to be with me were quickly erased when the reality that he'd fallen to sleep on one of the assistants and had just woke up screaming kicked in. He saw me yet was so sleepy he clung to the poor lady who had been looking after him. He didn't want to leave them...queue mummy feeling like rubbish! 

Eventually he realised I was there and made me cuddle him the walk back home. He had missed me after all - phew, he does still need me. 

We cuddled on the sofa for a while until he watched Night Garden and had his normal bath then bed. He was shattered and not surprisingly so, he has had quite the day. 

Enjoying mummy cuddles

This is only ours and Oliver's experience of his first day and something I am constantly banging the drum over recently is that every child is so completely different, and every mother too. 

There is no right or wrong way to deal with any of these life changing moments. The only way is what's right for you and your child. 

So whatever you are feeling about your child going to nursery, pre-school, school or even university, it's OK to be feeling this way. It's also OK for your child to be apprehensive, not all children are desperate to leave the comfort of their familiar surroundings and routines. It doesn't make them any less of a person for being this way - their way! 

All in all I could not be prouder of Oliver today. He is such a creature of habit and he loves a routine so today threw everything he knows in the air and yet he adapted and is still smiling. 

I'm also pretty proud of myself and Simon for bringing him up to be this adaptable and trusting of those we entrust with his care. 

He isn't back at nursery until next Monday so between now and then we will praise him lots about how proud we are of how he has coped and focus on spending quality time with him. 

I'd love to know if your little one has had/or due to have a 1st day this week and how you and they are coping? 

Working from home...the truth!

I thought it was about time I dispelled some 'working from home' myths as it's something I'm been met with a lot especially since working from home more frequently over the past year. 

For those of you who work from home, I'm sure you will understand where I'm coming from and for those of you who don't and see it as the easy option, please read on and I hope to change your minds. 

I divide my working life pretty much equally between being based in the office and at home. It suits our childcare arrangements with Oliver and works for my organisation too. I am extremely lucky so please don't think I'm moaning about having this opportunity as I really enjoy and am grateful to do what I do. My objection is when I get comments like 'working from home doesn't count as work', 'you're just sitting with your feet up watching TV really' and 'you don't actually work though do you?'. 

Well the answer is yes I do.

I have a desk set up at home exactly the same as I do in the office. The only difference is that I have one eye on the baby monitor when I'm at home and get made a lot less tea! 

I've often been told it takes a certain type of person to be able to manage to work from home and I can absolutely tell you that it is not easy. You have to really switch off. That bit of washing you'd like to do or hoovering that needs doing may be staring you in the face but work is the priority. 

Fortunately I'm pretty good at managing my time. So when Oliver goes to bed I make myself a cup of tea, settle down at my desk and get into work generally for 3-4 hours. I try not to have too many distractions, radio, TV, it's as much like the work environment as I can get. 
I actually find working from home really productive and I would go so far as to say it's more productive, for me, than being in the office. No quick conversations about TOWIE or the latest news story!  

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That said it doesn't come without it's challenges. When working from home during the day I find it particularly hard. Oliver wants my attention or the TV is on, there are lots more distractions and other things I could be doing. My husband, Simon is brilliant at making sure when I'm working he takes care of Oliver and distracts him. It's hard to explain to a toddler that Mummy is working and not to be disturbed but I hope the older he gets the more he will understand thing and appreciate that it means I actually get to spend more quality time with him as a result.  

So for those with the preconception that working from home is the easy route, think again, at least it's not for those who actually work! 

I'd love to hear your thoughts on working from home and how you manage it especially if you're a working parent too. 

Second Trimester Heaven

After a very long 3 months of nausea, painful breasts, fatigue, lack of appetite and trying to hide an expanding waistline, I'm now 3 weeks into the second trimester and finally feeling human again. 
The nausea has subsided, I have more energy and I'm so hungry I have to stop myself from eating, don't get me wrong though the painful breasts remain! 

During the first trimester I didn't believe anyone who told me that it'd get easier and I'd be feeling myself soon enough, it just felt like it was never-ending. Now I'm actually on the other side, it's crazy the difference a few weeks makes. My hair is finally less greasy and now 'the secret' is out I can wear whatever clothes I want and not worry too much about my expanding stomach (which is probably smaller than I think but in my head I feel like I'm carrying around a football!). 

I was able to go out at the weekend and be out past 8pm without feeling sick and falling asleep which was a joy and pleased Simon too. We can now finally have a social life back and start planning days out without thinking about the nearest facilities in case I'm unwell or having to make excuses for eating as I couldn't stand the smell or sight of food! 

My family now know what I look like again and I was even able to muster one of my favourite meals last week - mum's home cooked roast!  

Heartburn is my biggest irritant at the moment, oh and my mood swings which I'm sure my family and Simon would agree with. 
My friend Caroline gave me a good tip for heartburn - Love Hearts - so I've been stocking up on those and eating a few after most meals. It absolutely works so even though I've never been a fan, I'd rather that than the constant indigestion.   

Mood swings aren't as bad as I've been led to believe, yet!! Although I'm sure Simon would disagree, the main problem is my short fuse. My colleague and Friend, Gemma can be testament to this. For the most part of this week in the office people have just got on my nerves, no one seems to do their jobs properly and everyone is out to frustrate me. 

Onto the positive, feeling better is a blessing, it means I can look forward to weekends and enjoy time with my friends and family, plus I can enjoy being pregnant. It's such a wonderful time for any women to go through and I'm now going to focus on the positives. 

A Partners Role

During the first few months of pregnancy your partners role is crucial. It's a really scary time for parents-to-be, probably the most worrying you'll ever go through. Talking from experience now I know that there's no way I could have been strong enough to get through the past few months without the love and understanding of Simon, my partner. I've also realised it's not all about the mum.

Seeing those 2 blue lines come up on a stick can instantly change your life. As a mother you may have experienced some mild symptoms but as a father there is nothing, you have to trust that little white stick and the feelings of your partner that the little being that you helped make is growing (and fast!). 

I know from many conversations with Simon that at times he's felt really out of the loop with my pregnancy. He's often said when I'm laying awake at 3am not able to get comfortable that he wishes he could take on some of the symptoms. It's such a huge change for anyone to go through but when you're the Dad you're almost watching this all go on from another perspective. Dad's have all the same worries, is baby OK in there, is mum sleeping enough/eating well/exercising, what can I do to help, can we afford this baby. It's a minefield. 

From the stories I've read on the Baby Centre community some partners are really not supporting the mother of their child at all and this is really sad. Pregnancy is such a wonderful experience (albeit the constant nausea and tiredness are not so great!) so why wouldn't you want to share it. 

I probably share way too much with Simon, especially when I'm waking him up in the early hours for a chat because I'm bored and can't get to sleep. But it's all part of it, if I am going to be up and he wants to feel part of it all then why shouldn't I include him. 

I've relied heavily on Simon for taking on more duties around the home, something that was really tough for me to do at the beginning. I pride myself on keeping a good home, having the fridge well stocked, making his lunch and ensuring our cupboards are full of clean clothes that when I suddenly realised I was just too tired to do that and couldn't function when I got in from work or couldn't cope with the smell of his chicken for lunch, it was particularly difficult to let go and let Simon take the lead. In more recent weeks though this has been a godsend and I'm so grateful for his support.

I consider myself extremely lucky to have a partner so keen to support me during this time and I'm sure it'll continue over the next six months. Although don't talk to me about him putting the washing on.... !!

A few good apps

There really is an app for everything!

Since finding out I am pregnant I've been Goggling away and found so many great blogs and websites just jam packed full of information but the most useful source I've found is a few key apps! 

My favourite app is Pregnancy+, once you complete all your details it gives you a day by day update on baby. Simon and I have been really excited every week learning about how big baby is compared to various fruits and what symptoms I'm about to get! It has some great interaction elements too so you can track your pregnancy. 

The photos of babies development are incredible & I'd thoroughly recommend this app to all expectant mums to be. 





Another app I've downloaded is BabyCentre UK, this doesn't show as much detail about baby as Pregnancy+ but it does have a great on-line community. You can join various forums, one which is with the other mums-to-be in your birth month. This is great and has really helped me over the past few months as all the mums are in the same boat and going through similar symptoms at the same time so it's really good to be feel like you're not on your own and symptoms are normal. 

The final app I've been using is Emma's Diary. This was recommended to me a few weeks ago so I've not entirely got to grips with it yet but it has a section for offers and money off which is great. One thing is for certain since finding our I'm pregnant I am always looking for a good bargain! 

I'd love to know about any apps, blogs or websites that you would recommend.