What next?

It's been really difficult thinking of something to write on this blog. 

The running has pretty much run it's course, I can't seem to get back into it. I didn't end up running the Southend Half Marathon, it seemed like too much of a task and I wasn't at all prepared for it. 
I was talking to a colleague at the weekend about why I've stopped running and he suggested I'd reached my challenge so what else. He is so right, my challenge wasn't just the marathon but raising the money for charity so now that's done, it's odd to think about running being motivating. 

I have joined the local gym which I'm going to 2/3 times a week and I've got back into swimming so I'm keeping myself generally fit still. I start a weekly yoga class tomorrow which a friend recommended to help me chill out a little. I'm really looking forward to that. 

On the health front, things are looking up and becoming clearer. I've been back to the hospital for another scan this week and they are keeping a very close eye on me which reassuring. I'll know more about next steps at my next scan in 2 months but in the meantime, I'm trying to eat healthy and keep well. 

I'm wondering what to talk about on this blog next so I'm planning a bit of a revamp. This is going to more of a general musings rather than running, running and more running!! 

Now I need to find a new challenge...

Marathon Highlights - Chapter 2!

Having slept surprisingly well considering the vast amount of butterflies in my belly I enjoyed my usual breakfast of muesli and fruit. The sick feeling of what was ahead of me for the day hit me as I was getting changed into my running clothes realising that the next time I'd remove the clothes, or peel them off as was more the case, would be after I'd completed the marathon and had that medal around my neck. 

I set off on the tube to Greenwich park where I met Vanessa and we tried to find our starting pen. Nothing could have prepared me for the sheer amount of people there were. 

Ness and I were both really nervous but very excited, the heat wasn't helping our preparations, with that amount of people all in one place added to it seemingly being the hottest day of the year, we were both roasting before we had even started!

As we shuffled towards the start time all the runners started to wish each other Good Luck which felt like being part of one big family. Crossing the start line was really strange, it was quite quiet with people just getting into their zone. The first 7 miles passed in the blink of an eye. Although my pace was much slower than I had hoped we just seemed to be counting down the miles. The support along every step of the route really was amazing and there is nothing better when you're feeling tired than a stranger calling out your name and pushing you on. 

I had a number of supporters along the route and it was just the best to see them, emotions certainly got the better of me and I cried with every set of friends or family I saw. They were mainly decked out in bright orange caps with my nickname - Gingey - printed on them so they were certainly easy to spot! 

The biggest emotional outburst was saved for seeing my Dad, sister, brother-in-law and boyfriend. I was starting to feel really tired at around mile 14 and I hadn't seen them so was feeling a little flat, Ness was really supporting me but she was also carrying a stitch which she was trying to run through so both of us needed to see someone we knew. Then out of nowhere I saw their faces, of course they were all too busy looking at other people so didn't even know it was me until I jumped on them all in tears of joys. This really did give me such a boost though and I just knew after I saw them that I could carry on. 

The biggest cheer of the day definitely came from Auntie Debbie, Uncle Pete and Amelia, I saw them at around mile 20/21 so on the 'Home-straight' but was really struggling to keep my legs moving especially with cramp in my left groin. They gave the final boost that I needed for that final moment. 

The final 4 miles were without a doubt the worst for me, Ness has got her mo-jo back so practically dragged me along with her. Having said that two of my favourite moments were in the last few miles. Firstly, a pub by Tower Hill started playing one of my favourite songs 'Sex on Fire' so Ness and I were running along singing and really geeing up the crowd. Then just before Mile 25 there was a tunnel where no supporters could go, it was playing out really loud music and all the runners sang along to 'Happy' clapping along to all the good bits and seeing lots of motivational messages on balloons. What a moment! 

Big Ben was in sight and we knew when we got there we'd just cruise on through. One final sight of my supporters and giant cheers and that was it, Ness and I sang, danced and ran our way to the finish line. Nothing could prepare me for the feeling as I came past Buckingham Palace and down the Mall to see the finish line. 

In (a slightly disappointing) 05:45:30 I completed the Virgin London Marathon 2014 and I'd achieved something that most people never would or could. I was completely exhausted, drained and emotional and at the same time or a massive high but I had that medal and I'd done it! 

What a difference a year makes!

Just came across this Facebook status of mine from a year ago today! I can't believe I hadn't even thought about running seriously then & now I'm about to run 26.2miles of the London Marathon!! 

It's safe to say my achievement so far has just hit me!! Wow! 

I'm utterly proud & emotional now. If nothing else with get me over that finish line then this certainly will! 

- A very happy runner today! 

23 days to go!

I decided this morning to donate another £26.20 to my fundraising as I felt really positive on my run this morning & pushed myself with my pace too. I was also nominated by a friend for a 'no make up selfie' which women are doing to raise funds for CRUK so this was for my donation towards that also. 

When I went along to my donations page a few things struck me...

Only 23 days to go!!

This really stood out for me this morning, it's no time at all & I remember when it was 123 days! Time really does fly! I'm almost a little sad that in 24 days time this journey will be over. 

Over £4000!!

The amount of money that people have kindly donated is just wonderful. It still amazes & humbles me that my friends, family and even people I've never met have been so generous. 

Although I'm still £1000 off target, I'm really looking forward to the final push for fundraising over the next 3 weeks & with every donation that comes in, it really does make me feel great & motivate me to run longer & faster. 

Thank you again to everyone who continues to support me. I don't know how I'd do it without you all. 

20 mile run on the agenda for Saturday then it's all downhill for a few weeks of tapering & resting before the big day! 

x

Final instructions!

Well this arrived in today's post & I'm so excited to get reading! I'm off out for my 20 miler this afternoon then it'll be a long bath & read up on my final instructions! 

The nerves & buzz is starting to kick in as I approach sub 4 weeks!! 

Runners chat

Since my marathon journey began I've been talking about it on twitter a lot & thanks to some lovely replies to my tweets I found out about #ukrunchat. 

It's a brilliant community of runners around the UK, people who run short distances to marathons, it really does cover so many people & different walks of life. 

Now everytime I mention running I include this # & I am guaranteed some lovely replies or sound advice. 

When I was injured it was great to put out there how I was feeling & for people to then reply who had been in similar situations. It's really motivating too as there are so many people in the same boat as me. 

Many first time marathon runners who all want to share their stories so we can help each other through. 

Once a week there is the chance to submit questions which then get retweeted out to everyone so you can help each other through. 

It's especially been supportive the closer to the marathon I'm getting. Everyone is starting to get really tired & achy which a lot of my friends may not understand but the runners in the community really do. 

Although I'll be running the marathon alone I do feel like running is a great community to a part off & although I'll probably never meet some of these people, hearing about their motivations & getting their advice really does help. 

More waiting, more worry

After another 4 weeks of waiting on results I finally heard from the hospital on Friday. It wasn't the news I was hoping for. My case has been referred again to the board of consultants & they'll be discussing my results at their monthly meeting on Thursday. It's an odd feeling knowing that something is out of your hands & that whilst you're sat at work going about my daily routine there are strangers in a room at Southend Hospital discussing what will be happening for my imminent future. 
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't really worried and hadn't had a few sleepless nights in recent days plus I'm letting the slightest thing get on top of me. I have to keep reminding myself that I'm in really good hands & I that I'm actually very lucky. 

Onwards to the marathon training & with my fundraising now being over £3200 every pound that comes in really does spur me on. So anyone who may be reading this who has donated, thank you, it means so much to me & the charities. 

Touch wood my foot injury is now starting to ease off a little & after doing as I've been told and getting back into the training slowly, I'm now starting to get back on track. Tomorrow I'm aiming for 75 minutes as a short run & if I can accomplish that without stopping or having any pain in the foot then I'll be delighted & really feel like the marathon can be achieved! I'll have my full running confidence back. 

A bad day at the office

I've read on a number of running forums that most runners have a really bad training run before a big event, well mine was today! 

I've been feeling pretty exhausted over the past few weeks from a mixture of worry about results from the hospital, too many early morning runs, arranging fundraising events & generally doing too much with very little down time, so when the alarm went off this morning I just wasn't feeling it.

 

My good friend Dan was texting me about to do his insanity workout & he encouraged me to just go out there & run! 

I got dressed & ready to go feeling much more positive. My training plan wanted a 120 minute run which is a time I've completed a couple of times now so it wasn't like I had to really push myself to the limit - I thought! 

The weather has been horrendous lately with storms & as I run alone the seafront, it's very open to the elements & today's nemesis was wind!! 

We've been battered by these winds for days now & it's getting harder to run in them, today was no exception & worst than any of the other days. I was running into the wind & it might as well have been making me run backwards, it was awful & I used up so much energy just trying to put one foot in front of the other. 

About an hour into the run I became really emotional, all the negative thoughts in my head telling me I couldn't do it and the panic about the marathon being in only 9 weeks had literally hit me like a truck. I just sobbed. 

I kept running but with the wind, the emotion & the pain in my foot (which is always looming) I just couldn't continue. I stopped to catch my breath and stretch out my foot & that seemed to help for a few minutes. 

I decided to start heading for home & the though of a nice warm bath got me through another 30 minutes of very slow running. 

That was me done, 1hour30minutes & I couldn't do another step. It really was the worst run I've done both physically & emotionally. 

I got home feeling very deflated & frustrated with myself. 

It's left me feeling pretty low all day & thinking about what I could have done differently. 

I guess I have to put it down to experience & know that if I've hit a rock bottom run it can only get better. 

I have the osteopath tomorrow so fingers crossed the foot will be fixed & I can get back on it from Tuesday! 

Only 9 weeks to go & I really need to make them count! 

Another milestone

I've been beaming from ear to ear all day after completely half marathon distance on my training run this morning! I managed to complete it in 2hours 9 minutes which I was really pleased with. 

This is the longest I've ever run and if anyone had told me a year ago I'd be running anywhere near that amount I'd have laughed.

I have a foot injury too so that made the run all the more difficult & I've been struggling with my legs hurting since I finished the run but the main thing is I completed it! 

Plenty of stretching & ice being applied now! 

I picked up a new water belt at a local running shop yesterday which came in so handy. It has four small bottles attached so I can carry water & sports drinks with me at the same time, making a huge difference! It was really nice to have my hands free from carrying a bottle too. 

The best is elasticated so doesn't move around like most running belts as you're on the move. 

My latest running aid is banana chips! I now take a packet on every long run. I have a couple before I set off as I find it hard to eat anything much before a long run. Then after around an hour I eat a couple more & again just before 2 hours to give me that final boost! I suppose it's each to their own & now I've found this works for me I haven't looked back! 

I'd love to hear your running tips for hydration & boosting your run! 

Morning view

When I went out for my morning run today the sun was just coming up so I stopped for a few minutes to take in the view! 

Sometimes I feel very lucky to be able to run with such lovely scenes & it makes me feel really inspired & motivated! 

A tough week

The week I've been pretty much dreading for the past few months has arrived. On Thursday I'll be heading back to the hospital for my next colposcopy and to start another couple of weeks of waiting for results. 
People have asked me if it gets any easier, my answer 'No'. If anything because you know what to expect it's actually harder. The procedure isn't the nicest of things to go through but worst than that is the waiting. Your future is in the hands of someone in a lab somewhere who you will never meet! That is the scary part for me. 
Having said that, I've kept myself healthy & fit for the past couple of months so there is nothing more I can do than that, it's all out of my hands. 

This week my wonderful friend Caroline is the chosen one holding my hand through it all, it helps so much to have someone with you so take note, if you ever need to go through something like this, never try to soldier on alone, it does not help anyone, least of all you! Caroline, as with most of my friends, has been an absolute tower of strength for me throughout all of this and that really goes a long way to helping me keep my chin up, stay positive and smile on through it. 

I'll be resting up for a few days after the colposcopy so the training will need to ease a little, I've re-arranged my schedule for this week so that I am still running the same distance just on different days and thankfully I've saved my rest days for Friday & Saturday. Sunday will be a tough run as it's 1 hour 50 minutes but I'll be taking things slow and only doing as much as I can.  
If you are friends with me on Facebook, please 'like' my Nike+ update on Sunday morning, that's when I'll be needing all the cheers and support I can get. 

What is really motivating me throughout all of this though is that I am supporting two amazing charities and that by me putting myself out there, my kind friends, family, colleagues and even complete strangers are donating to something I feel very passionate about. 

Thank you all so much! 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

I took a bit of a break over Christmas & New Year from posting, instead focusing on spending time with my family and friends. It was a really lovely time & reminded me once again how lucky I am to have such great people around me. 

One thing I didn't take a break from though was training! 

I've been hard at it and upping my times and distances each week, I even ran on Christmas Day!! It was actually really refreshing to be out nice and early on Christmas morning and meant I was feeling really good (if a little achy) even after stuffing my face with all the usual festive treats. This Christmas was a first for me too, I actually lost weight instead of putting it on. It's all the training, it just seems to fall off, I suppose it's my metabolism.

I've decided to do a different training plan now which fits better for me, it was suggested by Cancer Research UK. I'm now running 4/5 times a week and giving myself a few rest days. This is really working for me as I now feel like I'm actually getting somewhere and giving my body a well deserved rest. 

I'm up to 90 minutes of running on my longest day now which feels so rewarding, I never thought I'd be able to comfortably run for 30 minutes let alone 90 so this is really giving me the boost I need to keep it going. 

With only 96 days until the London Marathon the challenge I've taken on is starting to really kick but I'm still as motivated as ever & am definitely already in better shape than I've ever been. 

So although it's a new year, the training continues, the commitment continues & thanks to some great support, the donations have continued to roll in for my chosen charities! 

2014 - The year I run the London Marathon! 

Run The Right Way

My colleague, Ian, emailed this link to me this morning. Two really interesting videos that could make you run more effectively and the right way! 

It's only 3 minutes long & could make a whole heap of difference to your running. I'll certainly be trying out the different stance on my next run. 

http://sanjayguptamd.blogs.cnn.com/category/cnn-lifestream-video/page/2/#lifestream

What a difference a year makes

A year ago today I went along for my routine smear test with the nurse. Thinking nothing of it at the time, it was about to be the day that set me off on a different course.
Thinking about it today with my stronger, wiser & much more focused hat on, I'm wondering what I'd say to 'me' a year ago. I'd have laughed if you'd told me in a year I would have a place in a marathon & be 4 weeks into training for it. 
I would absolutely tell myself to do what feels right. Something I have learnt over the past year is to have the emotion you feel like having when you feel like it, don't put on a brave face, especially around friends & family, and know that keeping positive & healthy is the best thing you can do. 

A year on and although I am still having to go to the hospital for check-ups & it is always in the back of my mind, I have new things to focus on & I've certainly never been stronger both mentally & physically.
It just goes to show you don't know what's around the corner. 

I recently came across this quote which fits just perfectly...

In the spotlight

Over the past week or so I've been working with a videographer creating a fundraising video. Brian, our work videographer kindly offered to film & produce this when he heard my 'story' during a recent work event. 

It really is amazing how people offer their skills to support me & I'm amazed on a daily basis by just how much support I'm getting. 

Brian recorded a sort of interview with me last Saturday where I basically gave my history & story. Having never been one for the spotlight this was a lot harder than I even imagined. I find it really difficult to articulate my story & feelings in words at the best of times but with a camera in your face it's even more pressure. Luckily Brian is an absolute pro so was able to coach the best out of me & hopefully got some really good quotes. I was also fortunate that my friend Alex joined us for the filming so rather than talking to the camera I directed everything to her, so it was just like having a conversation with a friend, the camera was just in the background. 

With that done Brian suggested he do some B-role filming which will go over my talking. He kindly came down to Essex in the week & recorded me doing normal things like making the tea, chilling on the sofa, then a lot of running along the seafront whilst he drove alongside with his camera in the window (apologies if we held anyone up along the seafront on Tuesday but all for a good cause!!). 

Brian also wanted to capture me walking into the hospital which has become something of a regular haunt for me this year. This was probably where I felt most exposed, and there was me thinking it'd be when I was running along the seafront in the middle of winter in Lycra!!! I guess the hospital when I visit is generally quite a negative place so to be back there wasn't easy and to remain inconspicuous & be filming was just a lot weirder that I imagined. 

Anyway, the filming is all now done & the footage is all in Brian's capable hands. Normally I would dred seeing myself on camera but actually I'm really looking forward to seeing what he comes up with. 

As soon as it's all finalised I'll post it on here so look forward to seeing what everything thinks of my big screen debut!! 

Huge thanks to Brian for doing this all for me & to Alex of course for getting me through the filming! 

Running is a lonely sport

Whilst doing my daily training run this evening it struck me at just how lonely it is being out running on a winters night.

It's hard enough to get ready to run & prepare yourself for the very cold, dark weather but motivating yourself without the help of others is quite a task. I find the Nike app motivating as I have friends on there so I can make sure I keep ahead of them. Whilst running it gives you quite a lot of time to think through any dramas of the day & what's on your mind but once that is out of the way then what do you think about & how do you carry on pushing yourself? 

Music is my key to keeping sane & blocking out the cold & tiredness but even that can get a little boring at times. Plus the marathon training tells you to sometimes run without music as during a lot of races you're not allowed earphones in so good to prepare without them. 

If running during the day it's always nice to run in public places so you can see other runners but the most you get out of them is a nod of acknowledgement. Running at night, even in well lit areas, is a different ball game altogether, you're lucky if you see anyone else mad enough to be out in the cold & when you do they're definitely 'in the zone'! As evenings after work is when I do most of my training, finding ways to keep my mind occupied is hard work. 

I'd love to hear from other runners in the same position to know what you do to keep motivated during your winter training? Or if you have any suggestions to help me along my way please be in touch. I have a feeling the mental strength is just going to get tougher as the runs get longer & the weather worsens. 

Long v's Short?

Now that winter has arrived I have a big dilemma!...

Do I go for the long running trousers or the 3/4 ones? 

It might be too soon for the long one's as it's not actually that cold yet but I was very chilly on my run last night. I don't want to peak too early and I have no other layers to call in when it gets really cold. 

Any thoughts from readers on this would be appreciated! 

So Long or Short? 

Let's get this show on the road!

It's been a little while since my last post & I have exciting news! 

I have confirmed my London Marathon 2014 place with Cancer Research UK. I've paid my £100 to secure the place & have it all in writing. That was certainly a daunting few minutes on the phone to the charity confirming it all. 

Now it is done the panic is setting in ever so slightly, I have a huge task ahead of me with the training & the fundraising so it'll be a really busy few months. 

As I previously talked about, I decided to give 10% of the money I raise to Jo's Cervical Cancer Trust so although my target for fundraising is now much higher, I get the satisfaction of running for two charities that I support & are very close to my heart. 

My virgin money giving page is now up online so all donations are being accepted! 
Click the image below to see more & make your donation. PLEASE!!

I will be doing as many fundraising events over the coming months as I can & I'll make sure I post details on here & my social media pages. 

Now onto the training, well with 24 weeks to go, the training has begun. I'm currently running 5 miles comfortably so improving on that each week & following a training plan which I downloaded from the London Marathon site. The clocks went back this weekend so the nights are drawing in & it's getting dark by 4pm which is going to be really tough to make sure I keep to the schedule & don't make excuses. 

I'm certain I'll stay committed espectially when I see donations coming in & with my goal in the back of my mind all the time, I know I'll be able to do it. 

More to come...  

Saw this...

Saw this photo this morning & just love it, it's exactly how I'm feeling at the moment especially whilst I'm trying to build my stamina for my marathon training but this photo says it all...

Happy Weekend Running!! 

All Systems GO!!

I got home last night to an amazing letter from Cancer Research UK congratulating me on being accepted for a Charity Bond London Marathon 2014 place through then!! 



After being really emotional and excited for the whole evening, I'm still beaming from ear-to-ear! I just can't believe that after all these months of waiting, I've got my place. I'm also counting myself very lucky as I know hundreds of people apply for these places every year and to be accepted on my first try is really quite something. 

My intention is that unless I receive an offer of a place from Jo's Trust or the public ballot, I will accept this place & raise as much money as I can for CRUK whilst also giving a percentage of the total amount to Jo's. Should I be selected for Jo's, I'll probably be delirious and to honour CRUK's commitment to me I'll reverse this and give a percentage of the Jo's money raised to them. Sound fair?

Thank you for all the messages of congratulations that I've received so far. It's going to be a long road ahead but I'm mentally ready to take on the challenge & I just can't wait to get going. 

Any tips or advise that you can share on your marathon experiences would be very much welcomed. I've already received a lot of great advise from previous runners which I am sure will stand me in good stead of the coming months of training. With plenty of hard work and determination, I'm ready to take on this challenge & cross that finish line having raised a lot of money for great causes.